Month: May 2005

For the last week..

wake up
play world of warcraft
eat (while playing)
pee (after holding it for an hour or more)
run to the kitchen for water (when my lips hurt cause they’re too dry)
sleep (once every 2 days)

that’s all i’ve been doing..
sorry world.. but i’m playing

So, didn’t know the Simpsons had my mom as special guest.. *chuckles*

The Keys to Your Heart

You are attracted to good manners and elegance.

In love, you feel the most alive when things are straight-forward, and you’re told that you’re loved.

You’d like to your lover to think you are stylish and alluring.

You would be forced to break up with someone who was ruthless, cold-blooded, and sarcastic.

Your ideal relationship is open. Both of you can talk about everything… no secrets.

Your risk of cheating is zero. You care about society and morality. You would never break a commitment.

You think of marriage something you’ve always wanted… though you haven’t really thought about it.

In this moment, you think of love as something you thirst for. You’ll do anything for love, but you won’t fall for it easily.

que pasa es que mi lato es wireless
> lato heheheh 😀

*OMG*
rolls eyes.. I wanna die

So.. Back on a bus. Always travelling, from A to B. The everstrong change that surrounds my stable life. It’s been a week since I arrived, in a rush, because the world stopped for a moment to let a kid relax. His calls, I’ll miss. His future, I’ll never know. It’s not such a big deal, just one more pawn in the game. But it is, he was the one.

Charmed was cool as always, enjoyed spending time with him. A little bit too much I guess. He’s a cool friend. Annoying, but cool. I hope I helped in any way to carry the burden, because losing the person you love most in the world it’s not something I’ve been thru. I wish there was something that could’ve been done. But this is as final as it gets.

Time heals, we know that. But scars are always there to remind us of our mishaps. And hopefully to help us be wiser.

Jealousy is a facet of greedyness. Learn how to let go, that will help stop the pain. Nothing belongs to you, everything is universal.

Love Hurts
Love hurts
You know love hurts

Not everybody knows

the way a river flows
Not everybody sees
the sun up in the
sky
Maybe you and I
should not try to plan our lives
If only what we
could see
what we hold in our hands

Love hurts
’cause you can’t
let go
Love hurts
’cause you need it so
Love hurts
yes it hurts,
but it’s good for fools
Feel some pain now, still you wanna try it
again

Everybody cries
until the day they die
And everybody feels

like they’re the only one
Maybe you and I
should not try to plan our
lives
If only we could see
what’s in front of our eyes, yeah

Love
hurts
’cause you can’t let go
Love hurts
’cause you need it
so
Love hurts
yes it hurts, but it’s good for fools

Love hurts

every night and day
Love feelings
never go away
Real love,
it
is here to stay with you
Feel some pain now, still you wanna try it
again

You’re dreaming,
you got me scheming
You got me freaking,

ooh love hurts
Love hurts, ooh yeah

Maybe you and I
should not
try to plan our lives
If only we could see
what’s in front of our
eyes

Love hurts
’cause you can’t let go
Love hurts
’cause you
need it so
Love hurts
yes it hurts, but it’s good for fools

Love
hurts
every night and day
Love feelings
never go away
Love hurts

yes it hurts, but it’s good for you

Love hurts
I guess it’s
useless to say
Love hurts
why won’t this pain go away
Love hurts


Love hurts
’cause you can’t let go
Love hurts
’cause you need
it so
Love hurts
yes it hurts, but it’s good for fools

Love hurts
that’s true
Real love, it is here for you

A dear friend passed away today. I’m gonna miss him and the opportunity of being closer friends, because he was an exceptional person.

Amazing how I can get stressed even without leaving my room. Today was a normal day like any other, play CSS until 9am, wait until Charmed goes to Uni, go to bed… it was after that when it got complicated, but let me explain.

I had told to call me if he was coming or not, you know just to know if he was going to come, he was supposed to visit, (it’s been due since.. well, who’s counting), and well.. he didn’t .. I expected that though, but I guess I get hopes up that he’s coming, even though is most probable that he’s not, and in the end I get disappointed, and it feels real bad. He’s been busy and stuff so, I guess I understand, but I wish he would follow thru on those little things. That raises my obvious self dubious questions, am I being too needy, am I calling too much, am I bothering ?.. that’s a question that has followed me throught all my life.. Am I bothering?.. I’m sure I don’t know where it comes from, messed childhood I suppose, but I’ve always been told I don’t call people at all, but… well… @^#!@*#&!@ MMMHHHHHPPPP !!!! COME SOON ! 😀 *giggles*

That single event stressed me out the whole day, and (I’m not writing to complain to you Mr. , I’m writing to let if flow for myself, cause my LJ has always been for myself) made me feel a lil bit uneasy. But that was just a little bit of what was expected, at around 8pm I received a call from Leo.. okay this is complicated, Leo is my ex-ex’s ex ex-boyfriend and he’s also my ex-ex’s ex-boyfriend as well … he called and had a sorta weird voice, even though it was the first time we spoke on the phone it was obvious he was distressed. He mentioned that (his ex), had been to his place last night, he was severly medicated (sleeping pills or something, seems it was more than 30 pills altogether) and had been acting like a lunatic, telling him how much he loved him and imploring him back. As he put it, he was acting like a crazy person. Seems left with him his cellphone and his keys, and told him that his mother had kicked from their home. Seems they had an argument and then left, at 5 am went back to Leo’s home and started yelling, and left. Now it’s been a whole day and noone knows where is, and I’ve had this knot in my stomach ever since I heard the news. I hope he is alright.

Te amo, Te quiero, Te Adoro, Estoy enamorado de ti, I’m in love with you, I want you, I need you, I desire you, Te deseo, Te extraño, Te necesito, I idolize you.

Te odio, no te puedo ver, más nunca, para nada, No, no te quiero, eres lo peor, te detesto, I hate you, I hate you with all my life, I despise you, you are the worse.

Is it really that different ?

Last night I ended up playing counterstrike all night with Charmed, It was fun to be able to actually be good at it, yeah you guessed right I pwend him. After that we Installed SJphone and Tried it for a while, which lead to discussing some about his exboyfriend. It breaks my heart to see him so vulnerable up about it. I Know that some pain is helpful, makes you grow, but he’s been going at this for the longest.

Lately all my posts have to do one way or another with my ex-ex. WTF? It would seem like if I were in love with him or something, *shakes head*.

I’m getting a lot better with the pocket Pc transcriber (handwriting recognition), so this whole post was handwriten fairly fast and with not a lot of mistakes.