FINALLY !!! .. I ordered the documents I need from the University, in 10 days I’ll have everything I need to send in my hands (except the certified tranlations, but I need to have all the documents to get the translations done) . I had chinesse food for lunch AGAIN. In the last month I’ve eaten like 15 times there.
While I was eating I was reading a book, it’s called Feeling Good by Dr. David M. Burns. It talks about how to deal with depression. I was reading a chapter about how some people need to please others to achieve acceptance, that in turn gives them a sense of approval. I think I am like that, I feel if I let people down they won’t like me anymore or love me anymore, I need to work on this, because I know it’s not a matter of self worth, it’s a matter of knowing when I can, when I feel good doing it, and when not. While I was reading the book I though a lot about Luis Antonio.
I don’t need people’s approval to be happy, I have enough common sense to make my own decisions. I need to work harder for myself, not for others, just for myself. That is not selfish, it’s just a path. Because when I get emotionally stable enough I will be able to share more.
My left foot hurts a little bit, I hope it’s not tendonitis or something like that, I will try to keep high impact exercises to a minumum for a while.
Peter’s been here the whole day, he’s my friend, and I love him very much, but I know I need to be alone… I need my space.. but he has nowhere to go, and I don’t want him to get sad. I’ll deal with it within myself…
Reading you past post’s, makes me to have a sense of the old luis, the one that cared about himself, and loved himself, this new attitude of yours it’s going to help you loadz, you have my love and my friendship forever, and of course, my eternal and devoted support in this new path you’re following, I wish you from my heart, the best of lucks, you sure deserve it hon.
And yes, I’ve been busy @ school -you know what I wanted to do about that, save the subjects I can, so I’m doing just that- and with my boyfriend, expending some quality time together, but I will post tonight, a mass update of my past few days.
I also need to tell you something, but will do in an email.
Love you luisito…
Truly yours,
Antonio.