Month: February 2003

Last night I ended up talking with Ryan until 2am, he told me in detail everything about when he first met Justin. What a sweet story. After that I couldn’t sleep so I ended up staying up until 4 am playing with network security. I found lots of fun stuff.

I haven’t talked much with Jon lately, and seems our conversations lack of any topic or interest now a days. I don’t want that to happen. I really like Jon and have enjoyed chatting with him for a long time.

I have appointment with Mrs. Shrink today, I’m not going to miss it !

realistic = 18 investigative = 13 artistic = 6
social = 15 enterprising = 0 conventional = 6

http://www.careerkey.org

すみません、おはようございます。
私は日本語が解ります。
でも、私は日本語が解りますね。
はい、私は日本語が少し解ります。

お元気ですか。いかがですか。
元気です、おかげさまです。

ラ ディ ソ ン ホ テ ル 成田 エ ア ポー ト
ra dhi so n ho te ru narita e a poo to

Damn, that’s how good my memory is… I did the personality test twice…

Last night I had this ugly nightmare, I felt like I didn’t rested in the whole night. Right now I don’t remember what it was about but it sucked donkey’s ass. Of course my ex was in the nightmare, and he was cheating on me or something like that, it felt awful, one of the things I remember when I woke up in the morning is… I said to myself “no wonder why I feel so bad about it, because it affected me so much”.

And the worst thing is that actually we didn’t chatted at all. Cause it’s more like a one way thing, I say long phrases and he answers me with monosylables, I don’t even understand why he would bother to talk with me, I guess he needed something…

I missed my appointment with my therapist today. It’s something that I’ve been doing for the last few sessions. I just totally forget about the appointment. I have too many things in my mind… 🙁

I met this guy thru internet, he sounded like a cool guy and he looked really cute. He sounded like he was shy and real.

We went out, it was fun, I enjoyed it. I felt somehow in control. I wasn’t afraid.

Today I spoke with the head of the computer sciences department, regarding my co-op opportunity in Japan, he …

fuck, I keep getting images of my ex cheating on me, sometimes stupid stuff make them appear, and I hate it… I wish them to disappear and never come back

…he talked about how he got included in some emails going back and forth and how I should talk with the guy in charge of internships in the technology department. Seems like noone cared too much about the whole idea, and was the co-op girl by herself who dropped the whole idea… I still need to talk with a bunch of people before this gets resolved.

It sucks to keep on hoping that something will come and make me feel better, but it never does, and if it do, it doesn’t work for a long time. Hoping is shit cause it will never work, cause the problem is me. My brain is the fucked up, not the rest of the world.

I wuv