I just don’t understand why I think about him so many times a day, it’s weird, with time I’ve realized how much he hurted me, and how many things he did that were inconsiderate and hurtful for me. But I still miss him so much, and it’s probably because behind all the bad stuff, there was something very deep that at least I felt that joined us. I’m very sorry he’s not here, and I’m very sorry all that empathy, buddy, and all that deeply rooted love (at least from my side) is no more. I will surely miss him very much, but I don’t want it to keep on hurting for a long time, that is not going to fix anything, what is broken will keep on broken, and what is broken is my heart.