Month: March 2004

I wanna cry but no tears come out.. yet.

I’m depressed.

Just arrived from Ultra, was cool… got depressed only for a little while and danced a lot.

+0M0rr0\/\/ i @M g0iNg +0 u1+r@. i @M v3ry 3xci+3d. i \/\/i$h i c0u1d g0 +h3r3 \/\/i+h $0M3b0dy $P3ci@1, bu+ i gu3$$ +h@+ i+z b3++3r iPh i g0 @10N3. m@yb3 i+ \/\/0N’+ b3 @z 3xci+iNg, 0r m@yb3, i+’11 b3 3v3N m0r3 3xci+iNg. 10+z 0f @dv3N+ur3$ @\/\/@i+ m3 +0M0rr0\/\/. i c@N’+ \/\/@i+.

• Intelligence destroys the beauty of any face.
• We suffer from what gods gives us.
• one of the beauties of marriage is that it conducts in a necessary way a life of deception to both parts.
• being natural is a pose and the most irritating one.
• i always choose my friends based on beauty and my enemies based on intelligence, you shouldn’t make to much efforts choosing enemies.
• i like people more than principles, and people without principles more than anything else.
• There is no such thing as a positive influence, all influences are inmoral. Because the goal of life is the development of your personae, to reach completely the nature of oneself, that’s why we’re here for.
• there is only one way to claim victory over temptation, and it’s accepting it. Resist it and the soul will get sick with the things itself has prohibited, there is nothing that can heal the soul like the senses, in the same what there is nothing that can heal the senses but the soul.
• Youth is the only thing worth it.
• What gods give will take away quickly.
• live, don’t be afraid of anything, don’t waste any opportunity, don’t fear anything
• world is yours for a little time, would be tragic that you will understand this too late.
• forever ?.. that’s a dream.. it makes me quiver to listen to those words. Women are so used to say forever, the damage every encounter trying to make it last forever

loser

A person who has zero or minimal friends. One who isn’t usually accepted by the majority of society. A person who usually(usually) has a higher intellect than the “normal” people because they may, or may not, enjoy educational television. Losers usually spend most of their lives doing or partaking in one activity.(computers, etc.) A loser usually is fairly unattractive and sees this certain activity as a refuge from the “normal” world.
Characteristics: May be pale, unattractive, a bore/freak to “cool/popular” people, girlfriend/boyfriend-less, etc..

That’s like sooo much a description of me.

Went with Tyler, quilly and darwin and had a picnic at the swamp. Near the paintball field, under the cacerina trees and a full moon, had a nice time. Quilly drank sake and ate sushi like a pig.

It’s confirmed I’m a loser.

I’ve been chatting with Matt for more than a week now. He’s a very cool guy. Very different, and amazingly cute. We traded a bunch of pics and he saw me on video jacking off almost everyday, which was very kewl. We wanted to meet badly, all the decisions made were really bold. He said he was going to fuck a bean up my ass cause that will I will enjoy it more. I like that. I like different people, I like to experience new ways of being.

Last week finally got again contacts. Tomorrow I have to decide whether to get 1-day acuvues or Acuvue2 (1-week). I think I’m going for the 1-day ones, they are more expensive, but u don’t have to worry about cleaning shit.