Day: July 8, 2003

Advice :

If you ever come to Japan, bring a whole case of Antiperspirant. Especially if you’re one of those guys you STINK like a goat (like me) if you don’t put on antiperspirant. In here you will only find tiny canned sprays of deodorant branded “8×4”.. Oh my god, that stuff is soooo outdated, noone in the western world uses 8×4 any more. And it doesn’t work.. I stink still !!! EWWWW !!

I can’t believe people ask me if I’m old enough to drink. HELLO !!! I can be your dad !!! Geez.. I love it ! 🙂

Ohh BTW… I started taking St. John’s Worth & Echinacea again today. I stopped cause I felt it was making me more depressed, but I’ve been feeling EXTRA crappy ever since I stopped taking them. So i’ll try them for 2 months !!

soo.. After talking with and realizing that, if I really loved my ex so much. There was plenty I could’ve done to help keep the relationship out of trouble, and yes he had needs, and well he furfilled them other way, just cause I was filling them.

So I decided I will try, cause after two years I still love him a lot. So I will try to go back with him, I haven’t talked with him yet. But I will, and will try to reach an agreement on how to make things work, cause I know that in many ways I was reluctant to bend my knees when it comes to money matters, and he needed the help I never offered.

I think this might work, I have everythign planned out.. see..

right now he has to go back to Venezuela, cause he has been staying illegally in USA, because someone at school fucked up with his immigration papers. So last time I talked with him he was planning on going back to Venezuela to get his visa again, cause when he leaves USA his visas are going to be cancelled. (now that I’m thinking, noone checks how long have you been when you are leaving, they check when you come back)… welll.. soo.. he has to go to the USA embassy to get new visas, but he can’t show he has enough $ to support himself while in USA, and his parents can’t either. So here is where I fit in the picture, I will help him as his sponsor so that way he will have enough financial background to get the visas again. After that, I’m planning on offerering helping him with the loans and we can move together and while I work, he can study, and then when we graduates we can work together and we’ll be all happy ever after.

Of course, all this happy and dandy story has many loose ends, but this is how my brain works, I dream this way, and these dreams are the ones who keep me alive. Cause if it wasn’t for dreaming, I will be a dry leaf.

Please please please god, let me be happy.. please please !!